In our tradition offering obeisance and performing puja to idol is part of our religious upbringing. Arjuna starts of the chapter asking Krishna as to whether worshipping god with form is superior to worshipping a formless one. The Lord says,” One is the means and another is the goal and there is no comparison”. From then HE patiently explains (Krishna is teacher exemplary for Arjuna is really a dumb student and Krishna explains the same thing a countless times till even he grasps it!!!) and that follows the backbone of this chapter.
Here Bhakthi yoga is seen as a staircase for personal evolution. The objective of a human life is MOKSHA; freedom from wants of any kind. I am free here and now and I am complete and I need nothing to validate my existence is one simple definition of moksha. For example, if I lose my eyes tomorrow, I must have the strength of mind to say,” So what? I will learn to live without sight from now on”. We are talking to this kind of attitude where sorrow can never intrude in my mind. Only a mind soaked in Adwaitha can reach this state of mind.
The 5 different stages of Bhakthi:
1) Karma yoga – level one: I lead a prayerful life and invoke God, the first thing on waking up, even while bathing and eating, working, and at the time of retiring to bed. At this stage, I have a lot of materialistic needs: son to get admitted in IIT, daughter to get married, a sick mother etc and I invoke God for his grace to alleviate me from my problems.
Most of us pray and remember God either for alleviating pain or for seeking prosperity (better car, better job, better pay etc). The primary attitude of a seeker at this stage is: Eeshwara Arpanam; dedicating all the actions to the Lord and Prasada Budhi; I accept any situation that is happening in my life as a GIFT from the lord (particularly the negative ones). The logic is simple. God can never be partial and whenever I suffer in life, it is on account of my prarabdha karma.
2) Karma yoga – level two: Here at this stage, I don’t appeal or beg the Lord to change my worldly situation. Instead I pray to the Lord for mental strength in facing up to my situation.
I will not ask God to change my karma and learn to be dispassionate to either success or failure. I increasingly have the maturity to realize that each experience in life has a lesson for me and my primary goal in life is to STRENGTHEN/TOUGHEN and PURIFY the mind. The mind needs to be nourished and be fit enough to learn the spiritual truths.
We see people take vows: wrapping a coin and praying for relief or fasting or swearing to go to temples if certain things happen. They are all immature behaviour and fall in a lower category. Hinduism is NOT a problem solving or wish fulfilling religion as much a guide for liberation (moksha).
If God were to appear before you and ask,” What do you want?”
Be smart and say,” Jnanam and Vairagyam” and nothing else should come out of the mouth!!!!
3) Saguna Upasana (Meditating on God with form) – Level one
Now, we will ask ourselves this question: what is more real? Body or Mind
The latter obviously for body has an expiry date while the journey of the mind is as old as Shristhi (creation). So, isn’t it important to STRENTHEN and PURIFY the mind?
The first stage of being on the “path” is to reduce our dependence on worldly things and start the “internal journey” of exploring the mind. A human life is at best a hundred years and so it makes sense to LEAN more on God with whom our relationship is endless.
Why can’t the world give lasting pleasure? Because, it is:
- Unpredictable (can you predict how your darling wife today will behave tomorrow!!!)
- Uncontrollable (World is nothing but external events and can anyone control the outcomes?!)
- Unsustainable (Bill Gates despite all his billions will have to die one day!!!)
Our scriptures advices us that for “emotional insurance” only devotion to God is the sole recourse. So, spend quality time and energy in worshipping god in solitude and may you grow stronger in the mind.
4) Nirguna Upasana (meditating on formless God) – Level two
As our dependence on the world decreases and as faith in God increase, there is one immediate benefit – Our bhayam (FEAR) comes down.
The purpose of meditation is to be in PEACE with oneself – find CALM, CHEER, and CONFIDENCE (3 Cs) in oneself.
The “Ishta devata” chosen in the earlier stage is now meditated upon as “Viswa Ishata devata”. Meaning, if you were meditating on Lord Rama, now expand it to Rama in which the entire creation rests.
Learn to see divinity in plants, animals, human beings including our tormentors. The payoff is that you begin to reduce your likes and dislikes (raga – dwesha) as everything emanates from the same Lord and nothing can be bad or superfluous in HIS creation. Quite simply, the mind EXPANDS and one becomes more tolerance of oneself and others.
5) Jnana Yoga
Only such a mind is fit to study Vedanta under a guru. It can easily assimilate,” I am Brahman and in me the whole universe rises, rests and resolves” for essential nature of God and ME is similar.
From a superficial viewpoint, a wave is small, fleeting, short lived while the ocean is infinitely large and almost permanent. But the reality is that the nature of both, the wave and ocean is WATER and from that viewpoint there is no difference between then. Wave is only a name and form (nama and rupa) and does not have separate existence of its own. For isn’t it WATER in another form!!!
For Jnana Yoga to sprout in one’s mind, one must be engaged in Sravanam (consistent and systematic study of scriptures under the guidance of a competent Acharya), Manam (Mental reflection) and Nidhi Dyasanam (assimilate the teaching).
In my next post, I will endeavour to describe the Bhakthi phalam (fruit of bhakti) as the mind struggles in its evolution to find peace and security.
Friday, October 14, 2011
The fruits of Bhakthi
Last lecture we saw the 5 stages of Bhakthi: Karma Yoga -1
Karma yoga -2
Saguna Upasana -1
Nirguna Upasana -2
Gnana yoga
Here I will describe the fruits of such a sustained practice.
Benefits:
The first benefit is FREEDOM FROM INTERNAL MENTAL DISTURBANCES
Why? Because, I have learnt to handle Raga-Dwesha. Once the source is taken care of, then its offsprings will no longer trouble us: Kama, Krodha, Loba, Moha, Mada, Matsarya!!!
Raga is strong likes and caused by an emotional dependence to the external world; of relations, events, and circumstances.
Karma yoga -2
Saguna Upasana -1
Nirguna Upasana -2
Gnana yoga
Here I will describe the fruits of such a sustained practice.
Benefits:
The first benefit is FREEDOM FROM INTERNAL MENTAL DISTURBANCES
Why? Because, I have learnt to handle Raga-Dwesha. Once the source is taken care of, then its offsprings will no longer trouble us: Kama, Krodha, Loba, Moha, Mada, Matsarya!!!
Raga is strong likes and caused by an emotional dependence to the external world; of relations, events, and circumstances.
Once Bhakthi is well established in an individual – HE has faith in the 5 stages of appreciating GOD- that person will never lean on others emotionally for support.
Remember, leaning on others is only ATTACHMENT
While giving SUPPORT to others is called LOVE
So, a true Bhaktha GIVES SUPPORT and DOES NOT TAKE SUPPORT
Dwesha is a strong sense of dislike and aversion to a person or event. Some of us even hate personalities from television news or even soaps. Or you might hate your cricketers or film stars even when they have had nothing to do with you personally – a sign of a weak and immature mind.
A true Bhaktha can never hate for he sees the entire world as Viswarupa Easwara. If that be the case, where will hate spring from? The Lord is all knowing and wise and who am I to question or hate any of HIS creations; bit hard to take if you have a nagging wife or Hitler boss at work!!! But the solace is GOD is giving you the bitter medicine for your internal growth.
So, a true devotee never complains about his lot in life and sees them as learning opportunities. He is incapable of hating anyone including a poisonous snake. He is smart enough to keep away but mentally has goodwill for one and all. Best wishes for every single thing. No exception.
Kama: He does not have any strong desires or passionate attractions. For he has discovered the fountain of joy and bliss – Santoshah- within himself and having tasted internal fulfillment, the outside holds no more fears. He is in a way unraveled the “concealing power” (in Sanskrit, avarana shakti) of Maya and for him the entire world is nothing but a play.
He works for “Loka Samagrah” (fulfillment of other’s desires) and this is a non binding work and in no way affect his internal equanimity.
Krodha: When do we get angry? It is an emotional response to something that does not tally with one’s intellectual norm.
For a man of realization, he sees the entire drama of life around him as a sport and the strings of Prarabdha Karma. When one is emotionally stable, then there can be no more violent emotional responses. Any intellectual disagreements are seen as different points of view.
LOBA is mentally holding on to things – attachment. Typical example is the mother-in-law holding the keys of the house tucked in her saree. That is a source of power!!!
Isn’t that sense of LOBA destructive and futile when I realize that I (the jiva) do not own anything including my body. I am not here to own but to serve is the attitude of a true Bhaktha.
Handing over the keys of your life to Bhagawan is a prudent move.
Dropping the sense of OWNERSHIP & CONTROLLERSHIP is a very important milestone in mental development.
For those grieving from loss of relatives, there is one comforting thought – GOD gave you a loved person and has now taken them away. Having enjoyed the gift so long, thank the Lord and go forward.
MOHA (delusion from right from wrong)
The greatest delusion is that the external world of people and events will give me happiness. The external world can only provide PLEASURE and PAIN; happiness is a far cry.
The world is characterized by Beauty, Variety, and Novelty (so many different people and all shapes and temperaments). But they can never offer Stability for all these elements keep changing with time. Watch the events and allow it to pass through without attaching any importance.
Only knowledge of Atman/Consciousness/Bhagawan is the ONLY security.
MADAM (pride/vanity)
A true devotee is never arrogant or envious for he knows the truth: all glories belong to the Lord.
When I see someone more gifted than me, there is no envy but pleasure that GOD is better manifested in that medium.
MATSARYA (Competitiveness)
An ignorant fool works all his life in one-upmanship, or Owner’s pride and neighbour’s envy.
Here the attitude of a Bhaktha is, “ I am fine as I am”
He can get along with anyone and others too take content in his company. The devotee is “considerate to others and himself”.
I will not disturb any setup
And no setup will disturb me…….that state is called SAMATHVAM
As anyone can see, these are benefits to being a true Bhaktha. It is definitely worth trying for and one day, we will get there. Better this janma or carry forward to the next but there is no escaping. All the best!!!!
Remember, leaning on others is only ATTACHMENT
While giving SUPPORT to others is called LOVE
So, a true Bhaktha GIVES SUPPORT and DOES NOT TAKE SUPPORT
Dwesha is a strong sense of dislike and aversion to a person or event. Some of us even hate personalities from television news or even soaps. Or you might hate your cricketers or film stars even when they have had nothing to do with you personally – a sign of a weak and immature mind.
A true Bhaktha can never hate for he sees the entire world as Viswarupa Easwara. If that be the case, where will hate spring from? The Lord is all knowing and wise and who am I to question or hate any of HIS creations; bit hard to take if you have a nagging wife or Hitler boss at work!!! But the solace is GOD is giving you the bitter medicine for your internal growth.
So, a true devotee never complains about his lot in life and sees them as learning opportunities. He is incapable of hating anyone including a poisonous snake. He is smart enough to keep away but mentally has goodwill for one and all. Best wishes for every single thing. No exception.
Kama: He does not have any strong desires or passionate attractions. For he has discovered the fountain of joy and bliss – Santoshah- within himself and having tasted internal fulfillment, the outside holds no more fears. He is in a way unraveled the “concealing power” (in Sanskrit, avarana shakti) of Maya and for him the entire world is nothing but a play.
He works for “Loka Samagrah” (fulfillment of other’s desires) and this is a non binding work and in no way affect his internal equanimity.
Krodha: When do we get angry? It is an emotional response to something that does not tally with one’s intellectual norm.
For a man of realization, he sees the entire drama of life around him as a sport and the strings of Prarabdha Karma. When one is emotionally stable, then there can be no more violent emotional responses. Any intellectual disagreements are seen as different points of view.
LOBA is mentally holding on to things – attachment. Typical example is the mother-in-law holding the keys of the house tucked in her saree. That is a source of power!!!
Isn’t that sense of LOBA destructive and futile when I realize that I (the jiva) do not own anything including my body. I am not here to own but to serve is the attitude of a true Bhaktha.
Handing over the keys of your life to Bhagawan is a prudent move.
Dropping the sense of OWNERSHIP & CONTROLLERSHIP is a very important milestone in mental development.
For those grieving from loss of relatives, there is one comforting thought – GOD gave you a loved person and has now taken them away. Having enjoyed the gift so long, thank the Lord and go forward.
MOHA (delusion from right from wrong)
The greatest delusion is that the external world of people and events will give me happiness. The external world can only provide PLEASURE and PAIN; happiness is a far cry.
The world is characterized by Beauty, Variety, and Novelty (so many different people and all shapes and temperaments). But they can never offer Stability for all these elements keep changing with time. Watch the events and allow it to pass through without attaching any importance.
Only knowledge of Atman/Consciousness/Bhagawan is the ONLY security.
MADAM (pride/vanity)
A true devotee is never arrogant or envious for he knows the truth: all glories belong to the Lord.
When I see someone more gifted than me, there is no envy but pleasure that GOD is better manifested in that medium.
MATSARYA (Competitiveness)
An ignorant fool works all his life in one-upmanship, or Owner’s pride and neighbour’s envy.
Here the attitude of a Bhaktha is, “ I am fine as I am”
He can get along with anyone and others too take content in his company. The devotee is “considerate to others and himself”.
I will not disturb any setup
And no setup will disturb me…….that state is called SAMATHVAM
As anyone can see, these are benefits to being a true Bhaktha. It is definitely worth trying for and one day, we will get there. Better this janma or carry forward to the next but there is no escaping. All the best!!!!
Thursday, August 18, 2011
Gurupoornima Talk – 2011
The nature of Happiness
Gurupoornima or Vysya Poornima is a day dedicated to the worship of the entire guru tradition beginning from Dakshinamurthy, Vysyacharya, and Adi Sankara. Besides worshipping these great masters we also dwell on spiritual study on this occasion. Brahmavidya or Atmavidya is the study of the spiritual truth or essence of the whole creation. It is defined as sat (pure existence)-chit (pure consciousness) –ananda (pure happiness). Today the topic of this talk is “Ananda” swarupa.
The first lesson of Vedanta is that “Ananda” is not one of the objects in creation. There is no object in this world as “Ananda”; happiness is not an object is a huge insight for any spiritual aspirant. Happiness is also not an ingredient of any object. Happiness is a feeling that we experience now and then in the mind. When it comes and goes we do not know. How long will it last, we don’t know. The next sms can snatch my peace of mind away!
Happiness is a feeling in your mind. I cannot experience it in other’s minds. Our general conclusion is that “Ananda” belongs to the mind. Since we experience it in the mind and so it makes sense to associate with it. But the Sastras inform us that happiness is a feeling that is “available” in the mind but it does not belong to the mind. Vedanta enlists five features of Ananda or happiness:
a) Happiness is not a part or a product or a property of the mind.
b) Happiness is an independent entity which pervades the mind and makes the mind happy now and then.
c) Happiness is not limited by the boundaries of the mind. It is an independent entity which is boundless, hence all-pervading.
d) This boundless happiness continues to exist even after the destruction and disintegration of the mind. It is all-pervading and eternal. Limitless spatially, and all-pervading time-wise.
e) This eternal all-pervading happiness which survives the disintegration of the mind is not available for feeling or any transaction not because it is not there but there is no medium for it to manifest.
Happiness seems like a feeling in the mind but it does not belong to it. Take the moonlight of a “purnami” (full moon) day. There is no such thing as moon light for it is only in reality a reflection of sunlight. Similarly, mental happiness is not mental happiness but Atman/Brahman appearing in the mind.
Where can I find this Atman or Brahman that every person or animal or even plants seek instinctively? I want to be happy at all times. One does not say that I want happiness only for one day a week or couple of hours a day. One wishes to be happy at all times and at all places. That leads to the second lesson:
Lesson – two: There might be a desire to acquire “Brahmananda/ Atmananda”. Where can you find it? Every person seeks “Ananda” instinctively though their way of seeking it may differ. One person finds happiness in a flat while another would insist on a bungalow. Happiness is universally sought even by animals and plants. For how many days you want to be happy? Say 3 days a week and 2 hours a day. The fact is everyone wants to be happy at all times and at all places. This leads to the second lesson that Vedanta dishes out.
You can never find “Brahmananda/Atmananda” in creation. Because it is not an object outside or is it inside the mind. Vedanta says that “Ananda” is never available as an OBJECT. Then I might wrongly conclude that “A” does not exist. The Sastras affirm to a mind-boggling premise: If “Ananda” does exist and it is not object, it is possible ONLY under one condition. It is the subject “I” which is the “observer” that experiences the objects outside and inside. OBSERVER is one that never becomes an object. Why? It is unobjectifiable. Vedanta says that Ananda is infinite happiness and it is you, yourself. It is never experienced or experientiable as an object of perception. You can never EXPERIENCE happiness because you are ANANDA yourself. It is similar to that the eyes can see everything except itself. The seerer can’t be seen. “Ananda” has to be claimed as myself through Jnanam.
“B/A” can never be got as an object. If it comes and goes then it is not “Ananda”. It is something you don’t find outside you, instead you claim it as you, yourself. Therefore “Brahmananda/Atmananda” is also called “Vidyananda” – it can be attained and claimed through vidya. Once I claim myself as “Ananda” what will happen?
Lesson – 3: The first lesson was the five features of “Ananda” and second was “I am Ananda myself” for a recap. Once I know I am “Brahmananda” all my struggle to get “B/A” from outside – objects, people, relations - will end. The struggle is called “Kamah” or “desire”. Desire is the mental struggle to get “happiness” by buying objects or pampering a certain relation. A bachelor gets married to find “A” through his wife. Then the married couple “struggle” for children…..every action of a human being is born out of a kama (desire). I tell myself everytime: Once I get that object I will be comfortable. What do I discover? I find that the object does not give me happiness for even a limited time. It seemingly gives Ananda for some time. Then I get worried about preserving it. Every relation/object is a strain and so I go to the next object (Kama is always a English comma!!!). But once I discover that I am the ONLY source of happiness then I will no longer entertain any dependence outside. The struggle to get Ananda from outside will end. The struggle to “hold on” to an object also ends. For instance getting a cook or a driver is so difficult; in fact moksha is a lot easier. When they come late you have hold your tongue. Arjuna in the battle cannot even imagine a state without Bhishma and Drona.
Earlier there was one relation we took for granted – marriage. Now even that has become difficult to retain. There was an article I read in “Readers Digest” titled “How to retain your spouse?” and that talks how to dress differently and how to exercise etc. What is samsara? Every moment is a struggle to attain or retain. It is cycle of Attainment (yoga) and Retention (skhema). The moment I claim “Brahmananda” then there is no struggle either for yoga or schema. The mind is RELAXED. The definition of moksha is the end of yoga/skhema struggle. For survival and livelihood, it is okay to struggle.
Samsara is a struggle to attain happiness. A mind free from Kama and Raga is a relaxed mind. In a relaxed mind my own “Ananda” gets reflected (relaxed because I am not worried about yoga and skhema). The reflected Ananda is called “Viragananda” in which there is no worry about acquiring or anxiety about losing.
If Jnanam and Vairagyam is not there then I will wrongly conclude that Ananda is an object outside (Moha). I will conclude even as a baby,” this toy gives me ananda and not that toy.” Today we have malls for toys and teddy bear costing over 5 k. In this consumerist society we are constantly bombarded: without this object you are not complete. Advertisements always show a happy family, swimming pool, sea-view, and very seductive images to sell. The moment I conclude that I can’t live without it, the mind becomes a demanding mind.
The struggle to purchase makes a relaxed mind into a demanding one. After 25 years of struggle, I buy a house for 75 lacs. I am so excited that I conclude that the new house gives me joy. Vedanta says that the house never gives anyone joy. Then what has happened? The desire to acquire it was so great that it build a mental pressure. Once I achieved that desire, the house serves as a needle. The pressure is relieved by the needle. The mind is calm once again; then my own Ananda is reflected (Ananda gets reflected only in a calm mind). I build up the pressure, buy the flat, then release the pressure and get my own reflected happiness. It is like Nasruddin Mullah’s argument!! He purchases shoes which are very tight. He struggles with them at the office for 8 hours. When he comes home, he removes those shoes and finds “Ananda”. We are all like that!! Every happiness stems from our illusion; we build the pressure and then we release it!!! A dog goes chasing for the bone. It bites it and sees blood. It concludes that the blood is from the bone while the reality is that it is its own blood. Reality: the bone is bone dry.
We are like that dog running after “Vishayananda” (objects and relations) out of ignorance. They contain no pleasure whatsoever. There is a lot of struggle: pain dissatisfaction-> further desires-> retention. Running after objects is SAMSARA; while Viragananda is moksha.
After attaining “Atmananda” if you go after “Vishayananda” then it becomes a non-binding desire. Claiming “Vidya” and “Vairagyam” is moksha and running after “Vishyananda” is samsara.
Gurupoornima or Vysya Poornima is a day dedicated to the worship of the entire guru tradition beginning from Dakshinamurthy, Vysyacharya, and Adi Sankara. Besides worshipping these great masters we also dwell on spiritual study on this occasion. Brahmavidya or Atmavidya is the study of the spiritual truth or essence of the whole creation. It is defined as sat (pure existence)-chit (pure consciousness) –ananda (pure happiness). Today the topic of this talk is “Ananda” swarupa.
The first lesson of Vedanta is that “Ananda” is not one of the objects in creation. There is no object in this world as “Ananda”; happiness is not an object is a huge insight for any spiritual aspirant. Happiness is also not an ingredient of any object. Happiness is a feeling that we experience now and then in the mind. When it comes and goes we do not know. How long will it last, we don’t know. The next sms can snatch my peace of mind away!
Happiness is a feeling in your mind. I cannot experience it in other’s minds. Our general conclusion is that “Ananda” belongs to the mind. Since we experience it in the mind and so it makes sense to associate with it. But the Sastras inform us that happiness is a feeling that is “available” in the mind but it does not belong to the mind. Vedanta enlists five features of Ananda or happiness:
a) Happiness is not a part or a product or a property of the mind.
b) Happiness is an independent entity which pervades the mind and makes the mind happy now and then.
c) Happiness is not limited by the boundaries of the mind. It is an independent entity which is boundless, hence all-pervading.
d) This boundless happiness continues to exist even after the destruction and disintegration of the mind. It is all-pervading and eternal. Limitless spatially, and all-pervading time-wise.
e) This eternal all-pervading happiness which survives the disintegration of the mind is not available for feeling or any transaction not because it is not there but there is no medium for it to manifest.
Happiness seems like a feeling in the mind but it does not belong to it. Take the moonlight of a “purnami” (full moon) day. There is no such thing as moon light for it is only in reality a reflection of sunlight. Similarly, mental happiness is not mental happiness but Atman/Brahman appearing in the mind.
Where can I find this Atman or Brahman that every person or animal or even plants seek instinctively? I want to be happy at all times. One does not say that I want happiness only for one day a week or couple of hours a day. One wishes to be happy at all times and at all places. That leads to the second lesson:
Lesson – two: There might be a desire to acquire “Brahmananda/ Atmananda”. Where can you find it? Every person seeks “Ananda” instinctively though their way of seeking it may differ. One person finds happiness in a flat while another would insist on a bungalow. Happiness is universally sought even by animals and plants. For how many days you want to be happy? Say 3 days a week and 2 hours a day. The fact is everyone wants to be happy at all times and at all places. This leads to the second lesson that Vedanta dishes out.
You can never find “Brahmananda/Atmananda” in creation. Because it is not an object outside or is it inside the mind. Vedanta says that “Ananda” is never available as an OBJECT. Then I might wrongly conclude that “A” does not exist. The Sastras affirm to a mind-boggling premise: If “Ananda” does exist and it is not object, it is possible ONLY under one condition. It is the subject “I” which is the “observer” that experiences the objects outside and inside. OBSERVER is one that never becomes an object. Why? It is unobjectifiable. Vedanta says that Ananda is infinite happiness and it is you, yourself. It is never experienced or experientiable as an object of perception. You can never EXPERIENCE happiness because you are ANANDA yourself. It is similar to that the eyes can see everything except itself. The seerer can’t be seen. “Ananda” has to be claimed as myself through Jnanam.
“B/A” can never be got as an object. If it comes and goes then it is not “Ananda”. It is something you don’t find outside you, instead you claim it as you, yourself. Therefore “Brahmananda/Atmananda” is also called “Vidyananda” – it can be attained and claimed through vidya. Once I claim myself as “Ananda” what will happen?
Lesson – 3: The first lesson was the five features of “Ananda” and second was “I am Ananda myself” for a recap. Once I know I am “Brahmananda” all my struggle to get “B/A” from outside – objects, people, relations - will end. The struggle is called “Kamah” or “desire”. Desire is the mental struggle to get “happiness” by buying objects or pampering a certain relation. A bachelor gets married to find “A” through his wife. Then the married couple “struggle” for children…..every action of a human being is born out of a kama (desire). I tell myself everytime: Once I get that object I will be comfortable. What do I discover? I find that the object does not give me happiness for even a limited time. It seemingly gives Ananda for some time. Then I get worried about preserving it. Every relation/object is a strain and so I go to the next object (Kama is always a English comma!!!). But once I discover that I am the ONLY source of happiness then I will no longer entertain any dependence outside. The struggle to get Ananda from outside will end. The struggle to “hold on” to an object also ends. For instance getting a cook or a driver is so difficult; in fact moksha is a lot easier. When they come late you have hold your tongue. Arjuna in the battle cannot even imagine a state without Bhishma and Drona.
Earlier there was one relation we took for granted – marriage. Now even that has become difficult to retain. There was an article I read in “Readers Digest” titled “How to retain your spouse?” and that talks how to dress differently and how to exercise etc. What is samsara? Every moment is a struggle to attain or retain. It is cycle of Attainment (yoga) and Retention (skhema). The moment I claim “Brahmananda” then there is no struggle either for yoga or schema. The mind is RELAXED. The definition of moksha is the end of yoga/skhema struggle. For survival and livelihood, it is okay to struggle.
Samsara is a struggle to attain happiness. A mind free from Kama and Raga is a relaxed mind. In a relaxed mind my own “Ananda” gets reflected (relaxed because I am not worried about yoga and skhema). The reflected Ananda is called “Viragananda” in which there is no worry about acquiring or anxiety about losing.
If Jnanam and Vairagyam is not there then I will wrongly conclude that Ananda is an object outside (Moha). I will conclude even as a baby,” this toy gives me ananda and not that toy.” Today we have malls for toys and teddy bear costing over 5 k. In this consumerist society we are constantly bombarded: without this object you are not complete. Advertisements always show a happy family, swimming pool, sea-view, and very seductive images to sell. The moment I conclude that I can’t live without it, the mind becomes a demanding mind.
The struggle to purchase makes a relaxed mind into a demanding one. After 25 years of struggle, I buy a house for 75 lacs. I am so excited that I conclude that the new house gives me joy. Vedanta says that the house never gives anyone joy. Then what has happened? The desire to acquire it was so great that it build a mental pressure. Once I achieved that desire, the house serves as a needle. The pressure is relieved by the needle. The mind is calm once again; then my own Ananda is reflected (Ananda gets reflected only in a calm mind). I build up the pressure, buy the flat, then release the pressure and get my own reflected happiness. It is like Nasruddin Mullah’s argument!! He purchases shoes which are very tight. He struggles with them at the office for 8 hours. When he comes home, he removes those shoes and finds “Ananda”. We are all like that!! Every happiness stems from our illusion; we build the pressure and then we release it!!! A dog goes chasing for the bone. It bites it and sees blood. It concludes that the blood is from the bone while the reality is that it is its own blood. Reality: the bone is bone dry.
We are like that dog running after “Vishayananda” (objects and relations) out of ignorance. They contain no pleasure whatsoever. There is a lot of struggle: pain dissatisfaction-> further desires-> retention. Running after objects is SAMSARA; while Viragananda is moksha.
After attaining “Atmananda” if you go after “Vishayananda” then it becomes a non-binding desire. Claiming “Vidya” and “Vairagyam” is moksha and running after “Vishyananda” is samsara.
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
The Value of Speech – New Year 2011
Last year the topic was ‘Value of Silence” and this year, I shall dwell on the “Value of Speech”. Both the faculty of speech and silence are equally important and we must use them judiciously. One must know when to use “silence” and when to use “speech”.
The faculty of speech is unique to the humans; like that of intelligence. These are two faculties that make us superior to other beings in creation. Both of them are extremely important (one cannot determine which is superior) and they complement one another.
A lot of research has gone into training the animals to speak; only with some measure of success the monkeys and baboons can be trained. On observations we find that the speech organs are well developed in primates almost to the level of humans but their intellects are not developed to appreciate the faculty of speech. Thoughts and words are inter-connectable is an important concept. The principle of verbal communication is that thoughts can be expressed in words; which then can be converted into thoughts and ideas in the listener’s mind. This inter-connectability between thoughts and words is extremely important and for this “intellect” comes into play. It is this lack of intellect that prevents a baboon or other animals from verbal speech.
Let’s take another extreme; the intellect is developed but not the faculty of words. We will be islands of knowledge with no method of sharing and communicating. There would be no library, no internet, and no institutions. These islands of knowledge will not be of use to anyone and similar to that of a reservoir that has no channels for distribution. Therefore both “intellect” and “speech” are important. That is why we have Saraswati as the idol for intellect and Brihaspati for speech.
If one can use both “intellect” and “speech” properly, the entire life will be a blessing. There are certain guidelines to master for intelligent application of “I” and “S” in day to day living. Observe these five areas and make an important difference in our lives:
a) Information Sharing (IS)
b) Acknowledgement (Akw)
c) Appreciation (App)
d) Consolation
e) Connection.
You can remember these with the acronym ISAACC (Newton)
a) Information Sharing
When we start our day, we plan our activities. Before implementing, it is wise to share this information with concerned people if our plans will impact them. It may not make a difference to us, but it will greatly ease other’s life. Not sharing information may inconvenience others especially family members. A housewife goes through daily agony simple because the members of the family don’t share their daily programme. When they go out and when they are likely to come. Whether we would have breakfast or lunch; whether they will bring guests or not. These people though educated in material sciences but they lack “sensitivity” to others.
Never take your family for granted and putting other’s in agony is Ahimsa. When the wife asks where are you going or when; the individual may flare up. They will quote scriptures: when I go out, you are not supposed to ask for it is inauspicious. Or take the example of a person waiting for “vadathiar” from 7 in the morning. The priest does not turn up till noon and this man loses faith in ‘Sharddam”. So it pays to always share information or update information so that others will have an idea as to what to expect. Silence in this area is pappam or gross lack of sensitivity for it is Himsa of other’s time. Similarly, if you wish to visit any of your friends inform them in advance. You cannot just land up as a gate-crasher. Fix an appointment and also the duration; keep up the appointment instead using Chennai traffic snarls as an excuse and turn up late. Giving the duration is important so that the other person knows whether he can spend 5 minutes or 50 minutes without upsetting his schedule. Athiti Devo Bhavah is our culture; where athiti is defined as one who comes as a guest without appointment. Therefore honouring a athiti is a punya karma; but becoming an athiti is a papa karma. Another meaning of ‘athiti” is one who does not have a second night. In the olden days, people traveled on foot to long distances and rested in the night at any village. They were looked after by local hospitality. In this day and age of planes and hotels; this will not apply. So from “athiti” we should become “sathiti” – be an invited guest or ask for consent. Can I stay? If they hesitate then it is better to avoid.
There is a funny sloka in Sanskrit. A son-in-law can stay with this inlaws for it is a heavenly experience for a week. If he extends then there will no honey, no curd, and no ghee. You can make excuses of no reservations etc. After a month, they will kick with chappels. The silver plate will become leaf; and plastic cups.
Therefore always fix up an appointment; duration even on the phone. Ask: is it the right time to talk to you? I need five minutes of your time (and stick to it). Information sharing is part of Ahimsa; the greatest dharma.
b) Acknowledgement
When the message is important, we use a registered post. This comes with an acknowledgment card. We feel relaxed that the mail has reached. So this same principle can be used in direct communication.
When I am talking, I have no clue how the other listens. For listening and registering are mental jobs; and the mind is an invisible instrument. Now I am talking to you with the hope and prayer that you understand the way it is intended. It is a one-sided action in total darkness. Darkness for there is no way of knowing whether the mind is in asthika samajam or not? Even if the mind is here, does listening happen? I have no way of knowing. Therefore, every verbal exercise is an exercise in darkness; like drawing a picture in a dark room. I start to draw Vinayaka and then it looks like Anjaneya.
Every communicator works in this darkness; there is a stress and strain to him regarding whether the message is understood or not; or its importance. The more important the message, the more the anxiety especially when the future is involved. As a listener, we can do a service here to allay the fears of the communicator just like we sign the ack card of the registered post. “I have clearly received and registered the message. I know how important the message is for you. I am aware of the emotions involved (from facial expressions and body language). I am going to co-operate”. Reproduce the message in your words to lessen the anxiety. It can make a fantastic difference in the intelligent use of the faculty of speech.
Instead should I be callous and talk of some other subject, then it will be registered in the other’s mind for his mind is still in turbulence. Instead of jumping to comments or suggestions or advice, pause to acknowledge the message the other is trying to communicate. This applies to even criticism; imagine a spouse giving a one hour lecture: you are useless through logical proof. The intelligent approach is not defending/ not denying/ not even silence. You must simply say,” You say I am useless. You say I am like that from the day of marriage in 1973”. Acknowledgement is not acceptance; it just relieves the other person. Some persons conduct programmes in 5 star hotels and charge 5 k for a day. The husband is made to sit in front of wife and listen to her for half an hour; then vice versa. He should listen without responding. Both come relaxed after the programme.
Therefore you don’t have to respond or reply to an emotional outburst. A simple acknowledgement can make a huge difference.
c) Appreciation
Appreciation is one thing everyone loves whether they deserve it or not. Even animals love!!! So do Gods!!! On Sivaratri day, we chant one hour of namakkam; appreciation of lord’s attributes and when HE is happy; we chant chamakkam. O Lord, give us our daily bread.
Everyone wants appreciation; it is nourishment for internal personality. Children will grow in leaps and bounds when appreciated. Therefore, liberally use the organ of speech for appreciation when you across any good conduct or deed. Look for anything positive to commend. Even if there is nothing, appreciate the existence of the person.
“Priyavakyam” or pleasant words of appreciation makes people happy and helps them grow internally. Let the proportion of appreciation to criticism increase. From 0% appreciation and 100% criticism; shift the proportion upside down. Watch your words and never be stingy in appreciation. It does not cost a thing.
Batruhari talks about the attribute of a Mahatma who always has a word of appreciation even if they find an atom of virtue in someone. They take a huge magnifying glass in appreciation and a concave mirror not to comment on hundreds of dosas. Therefore, never follow the value of silence when appreciation is due. Learn to appreciate your family members; never say that they are just doing their duty.
It is not right to seek appreciation, but it is the duty of everyone to offer appreciation. Don’t mix them up!!!! If we are stingy on appreciation, the Lord may take away our organ of speech.
d) Consolation
When we have physical pain, a gentle massage will give relief. It may not be a cure but nonetheless. Words of consolation serve similar; they are a massage for the mind (one of the pancha mahayagna).
Even there is no cure for emotional or physical pain of a person; we can give relief with words of consolation. Remember never to use this occasion for fault finding, comments, or advice or provoking guilt (you did not listen to me and so you are suffering now!!!). Consolation is words of sharing other’s pain. It acknowledges that I am aware of pain; I share the pain. Shared pain is pain relief and must be part of our day-to-day activity.
e) CONNECTION
To maintain any relation exchange of words are required. Keep in mind to avoid all uncomfortable areas. First before speaking, learn about the comfortable topics and uncomfortable topics of the listener. Delving on “touchy” subjects will end in arguments, conflicts, and fights. Instead of reinforcing a relation it will weaken it defeating the very purpose of communication. So, talk of pleasant topics like music seasons or any subject in which both are comfortable. The objective of any communication must be “connecting conversation”.
Finally if we use the organ of speech intelligently it becomes an ornament. The best ornament is the organ of speech which is judiciously used in these five areas. With this ornament, you can become popular in any environment; you attract everyone to you.
There are two kinds of people; those who give happiness wherever they go, another who give happiness whenever they go away. One brahmachari said,” MSM – mobile saw mill”, which means don’t be an aruvai. Let us not become MSM. Use the faculty of speech intelligently; it will make your life and others around you happy. I wish you a happy 2011 and may you make the best use of silence and speech.
The faculty of speech is unique to the humans; like that of intelligence. These are two faculties that make us superior to other beings in creation. Both of them are extremely important (one cannot determine which is superior) and they complement one another.
A lot of research has gone into training the animals to speak; only with some measure of success the monkeys and baboons can be trained. On observations we find that the speech organs are well developed in primates almost to the level of humans but their intellects are not developed to appreciate the faculty of speech. Thoughts and words are inter-connectable is an important concept. The principle of verbal communication is that thoughts can be expressed in words; which then can be converted into thoughts and ideas in the listener’s mind. This inter-connectability between thoughts and words is extremely important and for this “intellect” comes into play. It is this lack of intellect that prevents a baboon or other animals from verbal speech.
Let’s take another extreme; the intellect is developed but not the faculty of words. We will be islands of knowledge with no method of sharing and communicating. There would be no library, no internet, and no institutions. These islands of knowledge will not be of use to anyone and similar to that of a reservoir that has no channels for distribution. Therefore both “intellect” and “speech” are important. That is why we have Saraswati as the idol for intellect and Brihaspati for speech.
If one can use both “intellect” and “speech” properly, the entire life will be a blessing. There are certain guidelines to master for intelligent application of “I” and “S” in day to day living. Observe these five areas and make an important difference in our lives:
a) Information Sharing (IS)
b) Acknowledgement (Akw)
c) Appreciation (App)
d) Consolation
e) Connection.
You can remember these with the acronym ISAACC (Newton)
a) Information Sharing
When we start our day, we plan our activities. Before implementing, it is wise to share this information with concerned people if our plans will impact them. It may not make a difference to us, but it will greatly ease other’s life. Not sharing information may inconvenience others especially family members. A housewife goes through daily agony simple because the members of the family don’t share their daily programme. When they go out and when they are likely to come. Whether we would have breakfast or lunch; whether they will bring guests or not. These people though educated in material sciences but they lack “sensitivity” to others.
Never take your family for granted and putting other’s in agony is Ahimsa. When the wife asks where are you going or when; the individual may flare up. They will quote scriptures: when I go out, you are not supposed to ask for it is inauspicious. Or take the example of a person waiting for “vadathiar” from 7 in the morning. The priest does not turn up till noon and this man loses faith in ‘Sharddam”. So it pays to always share information or update information so that others will have an idea as to what to expect. Silence in this area is pappam or gross lack of sensitivity for it is Himsa of other’s time. Similarly, if you wish to visit any of your friends inform them in advance. You cannot just land up as a gate-crasher. Fix an appointment and also the duration; keep up the appointment instead using Chennai traffic snarls as an excuse and turn up late. Giving the duration is important so that the other person knows whether he can spend 5 minutes or 50 minutes without upsetting his schedule. Athiti Devo Bhavah is our culture; where athiti is defined as one who comes as a guest without appointment. Therefore honouring a athiti is a punya karma; but becoming an athiti is a papa karma. Another meaning of ‘athiti” is one who does not have a second night. In the olden days, people traveled on foot to long distances and rested in the night at any village. They were looked after by local hospitality. In this day and age of planes and hotels; this will not apply. So from “athiti” we should become “sathiti” – be an invited guest or ask for consent. Can I stay? If they hesitate then it is better to avoid.
There is a funny sloka in Sanskrit. A son-in-law can stay with this inlaws for it is a heavenly experience for a week. If he extends then there will no honey, no curd, and no ghee. You can make excuses of no reservations etc. After a month, they will kick with chappels. The silver plate will become leaf; and plastic cups.
Therefore always fix up an appointment; duration even on the phone. Ask: is it the right time to talk to you? I need five minutes of your time (and stick to it). Information sharing is part of Ahimsa; the greatest dharma.
b) Acknowledgement
When the message is important, we use a registered post. This comes with an acknowledgment card. We feel relaxed that the mail has reached. So this same principle can be used in direct communication.
When I am talking, I have no clue how the other listens. For listening and registering are mental jobs; and the mind is an invisible instrument. Now I am talking to you with the hope and prayer that you understand the way it is intended. It is a one-sided action in total darkness. Darkness for there is no way of knowing whether the mind is in asthika samajam or not? Even if the mind is here, does listening happen? I have no way of knowing. Therefore, every verbal exercise is an exercise in darkness; like drawing a picture in a dark room. I start to draw Vinayaka and then it looks like Anjaneya.
Every communicator works in this darkness; there is a stress and strain to him regarding whether the message is understood or not; or its importance. The more important the message, the more the anxiety especially when the future is involved. As a listener, we can do a service here to allay the fears of the communicator just like we sign the ack card of the registered post. “I have clearly received and registered the message. I know how important the message is for you. I am aware of the emotions involved (from facial expressions and body language). I am going to co-operate”. Reproduce the message in your words to lessen the anxiety. It can make a fantastic difference in the intelligent use of the faculty of speech.
Instead should I be callous and talk of some other subject, then it will be registered in the other’s mind for his mind is still in turbulence. Instead of jumping to comments or suggestions or advice, pause to acknowledge the message the other is trying to communicate. This applies to even criticism; imagine a spouse giving a one hour lecture: you are useless through logical proof. The intelligent approach is not defending/ not denying/ not even silence. You must simply say,” You say I am useless. You say I am like that from the day of marriage in 1973”. Acknowledgement is not acceptance; it just relieves the other person. Some persons conduct programmes in 5 star hotels and charge 5 k for a day. The husband is made to sit in front of wife and listen to her for half an hour; then vice versa. He should listen without responding. Both come relaxed after the programme.
Therefore you don’t have to respond or reply to an emotional outburst. A simple acknowledgement can make a huge difference.
c) Appreciation
Appreciation is one thing everyone loves whether they deserve it or not. Even animals love!!! So do Gods!!! On Sivaratri day, we chant one hour of namakkam; appreciation of lord’s attributes and when HE is happy; we chant chamakkam. O Lord, give us our daily bread.
Everyone wants appreciation; it is nourishment for internal personality. Children will grow in leaps and bounds when appreciated. Therefore, liberally use the organ of speech for appreciation when you across any good conduct or deed. Look for anything positive to commend. Even if there is nothing, appreciate the existence of the person.
“Priyavakyam” or pleasant words of appreciation makes people happy and helps them grow internally. Let the proportion of appreciation to criticism increase. From 0% appreciation and 100% criticism; shift the proportion upside down. Watch your words and never be stingy in appreciation. It does not cost a thing.
Batruhari talks about the attribute of a Mahatma who always has a word of appreciation even if they find an atom of virtue in someone. They take a huge magnifying glass in appreciation and a concave mirror not to comment on hundreds of dosas. Therefore, never follow the value of silence when appreciation is due. Learn to appreciate your family members; never say that they are just doing their duty.
It is not right to seek appreciation, but it is the duty of everyone to offer appreciation. Don’t mix them up!!!! If we are stingy on appreciation, the Lord may take away our organ of speech.
d) Consolation
When we have physical pain, a gentle massage will give relief. It may not be a cure but nonetheless. Words of consolation serve similar; they are a massage for the mind (one of the pancha mahayagna).
Even there is no cure for emotional or physical pain of a person; we can give relief with words of consolation. Remember never to use this occasion for fault finding, comments, or advice or provoking guilt (you did not listen to me and so you are suffering now!!!). Consolation is words of sharing other’s pain. It acknowledges that I am aware of pain; I share the pain. Shared pain is pain relief and must be part of our day-to-day activity.
e) CONNECTION
To maintain any relation exchange of words are required. Keep in mind to avoid all uncomfortable areas. First before speaking, learn about the comfortable topics and uncomfortable topics of the listener. Delving on “touchy” subjects will end in arguments, conflicts, and fights. Instead of reinforcing a relation it will weaken it defeating the very purpose of communication. So, talk of pleasant topics like music seasons or any subject in which both are comfortable. The objective of any communication must be “connecting conversation”.
Finally if we use the organ of speech intelligently it becomes an ornament. The best ornament is the organ of speech which is judiciously used in these five areas. With this ornament, you can become popular in any environment; you attract everyone to you.
There are two kinds of people; those who give happiness wherever they go, another who give happiness whenever they go away. One brahmachari said,” MSM – mobile saw mill”, which means don’t be an aruvai. Let us not become MSM. Use the faculty of speech intelligently; it will make your life and others around you happy. I wish you a happy 2011 and may you make the best use of silence and speech.
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